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Word of the Week: Phoney

phone broken on battlefield

For fans of Catcher in the Rye (none of whom I’ve ever met, perhaps because they tend to end up in prison), I should explain that I’ve gone with the World War II spelling of phoney, rather than the more popular e-less version favoured by JD Salinger’s antihero Holden Caulfield. And here’s why. (more…)

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Word of the Week: Super

superman badge

Bit of a cock-up on the football front. Having witnessed the swiftest and most pathetic volte-face since my cat mistook a badger for a pigeon, I’m now feeling unusually well disposed towards the owners of European football’s richest clubs. They are the gift that keeps on giving. (more…)

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Word of the Week: Pitch


I learnt today that a pitchfork isn’t called a pitchfork because you use it to pitch hay onto a hay cart, it’s called a pitchfork because it’s pointy and you poke it into the hay. That’s what pitch meant originally. This might not have a great bearing on the hi-tech digital world you live in but I thought I’d mention it because the cricket season is just around the corner.


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In Words

Word of the Week: Router

Using a router on wood

If you’ve ever tried your hand at fine cabinet making, you’ll be familiar with the router. It’s a clever electrical tool for cutting very uniform, patterned, grooves in wood. I mention this because my friend Nick recently took delivery of one by mistake – you could say it had been misrouted – and, being a drummer, he immediately set about demolishing his shed.

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Word of the Week: Vanish

Empty chair

On Monday I was packing up old toner cartridges for recycling and one of the little sods, despite having declared itself empty (long before emitting anything like the 400 or so pages worth of ink that it claimed to), managed to muster a final squirt of magenta to smudge on my jumper. That’s the reward I get for being planet conscious.

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